Thursday, 2 October 2008

Au Revoir

I am officially in mourning.

You know life can be hard and I do try to maintain a cheery attitude, true as it is, most days I fail.

Like today when on the traipse home from school I saw my three year old headed towards dog poop. Not any ordinary dog poo but diarrhea dog poop! I guess the fact that it was diarrhea confused him and made him lose control of all the 3 ounces of sense a three year old possesses because before I could scream 'hand sanitiser' I saw him bending down. I almost managed to avoid the catastrophe, but only almost. I grabbed his coat by the hood and yanked hard in a manner that could have been categorised as child abuse, but it was after all an emergency. His fingertips had barely reached the excrement but small brown circles of dog faeces were evident.

I didn't have any baby wipes to hand and when I explained it was dog poo and shrieked 4 verses of 'what were you thinking?' it turns out he thought it was a stone. Yep, I always got muddled between a stone and dog diarrhea. Happens all the time. Easy mistake to make.

So now I will forever be known to those who have the downhill route home from school as the hysterical mother of that boy who puts his hand in dog diarrhea. Charming.

But that is only part of my trauma....

You know I waited all summer long for summer to make it's appearance.

It never really made it.

I know I shouldn't really be complaining though because we by far had the best of the weather during our family holiday.

1 entire week without rain, big-flaming-whoop!

Then Autumn came and for the first 5 majestic days I enjoyed the beauty of the change in seasons. Seeing the leaves turning brown and falling from the trees, enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sunshine.

This I could get on board with.

Then as quickly as Autumn had arrived it had departed.

Not to be a grump (well maybe a bit!) but Winter has now officially arrived. I have been cold and I have been rained on more than I would like and it is only October 2nd. I am seriously considering homeschooling my children so that I don't have to brave the elements for the next 7 months (and partly to avoid the unenviable tag of dog poop mother). Why oh why does Thomas' school have to be up an enormous hill (well it feel enormous at least to my unfit self) and why does the wind always have to be blowing downhill just to make my journey all the more depressing? Of course on my descent the wind fails to blow at all. The wind it would seem is in conspiracy against me.

Yep, that's right. We may be lucky enough to enjoy all 4 seasons here in my homeland but for some unfathomable reason Spring is 4 months long, Summer a week or two at best, Autumn even shorter in length than summer if such a thing were imaginable and Winter 7 eternally long months.

So faced with the choices of eating my body weight in chocolate to make me feel better and hibernation I decided to choose the latter.

I'll be seeing you all in Spring.

And the sun had better be shining!!

post signature

19 lovely comments:

Claire said...

Yeah - what IS with all the dog cack everywhere?! I wheeled over a large mound of it with the buggy taking Eilidh to school. It prompted Hannah to point at it for the rest of the trip, while shouting "jobbie!! jobbie!!".
There seems to be a trend emerging... walks to school + crumby weather + jobbies en route = mother's fury. I certainly didn't sign up for this! Did you!?

Threeboys1mommy said...

Ha ha! Dog Poop mommy! Dog Poop Mommy! (point laugh)

Citoyen said...

I hate the weather in this blessed country. I share your pain mate.

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

He must have a nose for the stuff ;)

I envy your seasons really--we have a very long, dry, hot summer a week of fall, a month of winter (mostly cold with a day or so of ice) a week of spring and then back to triple digit summer...and it is still summer right now. Oh to light a fire and snuggle under a blanket watching the snow.....total, utter JOY :)

Krystyn said...

Oh, Carol...that sucks! You must come and move here.

Dog diarrhea? Yeah, looks just like a stone. They keep you on your toes, don't they?

jOni lAnE said...

What is up with your kids and poop??? Human or animal. Gross. I love that you swooped in at "just" the right time!
Smiles,
J

Mama Smurf said...

I hear ya. The seasons aren't a whole lot better here in my neck of the woods. The inevitable decent into the hell that is winter cometh.

*sigh*

Ashley said...

I guess I probably shouldnt tell you that its still about 90 degrees here and if I dont wear shorts ill melt. I think we have winter about as long as you have summer. haha

But on a positive note you can always tell people you work out. If I had to do an uphill climb twice a day I know I would. Add it to your cross-trainer benefits! lol

Becky said...

Oh my goodness, dog diarrhea is seriously gross.... I wouldn't even know how to deal with that!!!

Yeah- what is the deal with the sudden Winter!!! I'm gutted- I really wanted a long nice Autumn without weeks of endless rain.

Thankyou for always commenting on my blog... it's nice to know someone out there actually reads my insane ramblings..... as far as Wayne goes, I think Lauren told Ian he would be over on Oct 17th? I think... only for a day though so dunno if he's gonna come up for a Balti. You never know, his plans change that frequently we might have it all wrong by now... We're definatly up for it though!!!

Susan said...

Ugh! What is it with boys and gross stuff? Mine loves poking around at bird poop when he sees it. Disgusting! (Dog diarrhea...much worse.)
Hope you have a mild winter and the months fly by until the nicer weather.

Kate said...

oh my. I almost peed my pants laughing at this, which is both too much information and slightly rude (I would SO NOT be laughing if my three year old had gone hands first into poo)....

Kelli @ writing the waves said...

Oh my gosh, Carol. I was totally envisioning this as if I had been there. You describe it so perfectly! I'm so sorry...especially about the weather too. Such a bummer.

Shannon said...

I know the weather can be rough but I still love it there so much . . . every time we visit I promise myself we will move there one day. Sorry about the weather woes though, they are not fun . . . but just concentrate on all the British architecture, history, and culture that I am so envious of :-)

Candy said...

grooooooossssssssssss.

I seriously don't think there is ANYTHING grosser than doggie poopie.

hang in there;0)

4funboys said...

Sunny CA girl is feeling your pain... it's raining here for the first time and I'm already missing the sunshine...

the doggie surprise... not so much! ewwwww

4funboys said...

I used to let my boys have 1 candy every day... thinking I was doing "so good"... but my dentist told me it was better to let them have all they wanted in 1 or 2 settings (within reason)... because even a little bit of sugar over a period of time is much harder on the teeth.

so... we're not big Halloween fans around here; but at least the kids get a little candy for a day or two. (The rest goes to my school prize box)

Chocolate on my Cranium said...

Is it bad that I'm laughing my head off and thinking I wonder what he'd get into if he visited our farm? There's a lot more than dog poo around here! :D

Marketing Gurl said...

This is so so funny...this is great...dog poo. I also heard kids use liter boxes like sand boxes. I will need to nix that one some day!

Melissa said...

ok.... the dog poo.... that was just NASTY! I would probably through a HUGE fit if Kendra did that!!!! SICK!!!!!!!!

Also, sorry that the weather is so nasty there! Poor thing! If it's any consolation, it's not that nice here either. We've had lots of wind and rain, and I know it's just a precursor of the months to come......