You know I can't think about the 4th of July without having a little bit of a chuckle. Without fail I recall 4th of July 2000 when I was working for EFY (Church Youth camp) and on waking at some unearthly hour I stepped out into the corridor of Stover Building on BYU campus only to fall into the deathly embrace of a truly hysterical 14 year old girl.
The source of hysteria was not immediately obvious to me. I had already learned that Summer that 14 year old girls aren't particularly easy to understand even when they are being fully rational. Considering the weeping mess in question wasn't rational in the slightest and that at 6am I am not particularly patient (or attractive) I escorted weeping mess back to her room hoping that her room mate could shed some light on the issue at hand.
At this point I was thinking either a fatality had occurred in her family or heaven forbid *NSYNC had disbanded unexpectedly. But when we got to the bottom of things it was neither of my suspected scenarios. Instead the poor girl was simply devastated because she had come to the realisation (dimwitted as it may well have been) that it was just dreadful that her delightful (my word not hers) EFY counselor should have to leave US shores at the summers end only to return to a country completely lacking in liberty.
Now I don't know whether the Utah education service (if that is what it is even called) was to blame or if the girl in question was just a lovely dimwit but I'd like to assure all the world that we are happily enjoying the fruits of liberty on this side of the Atlantic also.
Just in case you needed any clarity on that point.
So in honour of all my lovely friends in the USA I decided to give you a little peek into the reasons Rob and I would actually consider leaving our home and moving Westward.
Rob's 3 reasons (Which I have kindly chosen for him because I am a thoughtful wife like that!)
Root Beer, another US staple sadly lacking from our British lives. Rob recently purchased some from an import place for a pricey $1.40 per can. Criminal. He remembers fondly being able to purchase 12 cans for $3 at Walmart. That gem has frequently come up in conversation.
Rob would happily eat his body weight in these bad boys, but don't tell his dad...he's a dentist!
Pretzels, Pure Carbohydrate heaven. Yummo!
Corn Dogs. Genius invention. When the Siswick's hit Florida in 2005 my sister in law (who had previously lived in Dallas for 18 months) looked at me like I was the definition of white trash for stocking up on corn dogs. I know they're not classy but they are dinner on a stick and I am easily impressed.
You would imagine the prospect of paying 50% less than we pay for petrol (yet you are complaining, Tut! Tut!), or the fact that salaries in the US are higher than here and everything costs half the price would have swayed us somewhat.
But no all of our reasons for ever considering American citizenship are food and beverage related. So it's just as well we aren't ever going to seriously consider it because we'd be living on a diet of Corn Dogs, Taco Bell, Candy, Root Beer and Shaved Ice.
At least our grocery bill would be cheap.
Which is just as well because our inevitable heart bypass would no doubt be pricey!